STOP, YOU’RE TEARING THIS FAMILY APART!
Cats have hearts of gold and don’t let anyone tell you otherwise.
MY MOM DECIDED THAT SINCE I FUCKING HATE CLEANING THE LITTERBOX FOR MY DUMB CATS SHE’S ACTUALLY MAKE ME A FUCKING LITTERBOX CAKE. THIS IS A FUCKING CAKE. THOSE ARE SLIGHTLY MELTED TOOTSIE ROLLS. THOSE ARE LOTS OF COOKIE CRUMBLES. BUT IT LOOKS FUCKING REAL. I ATE THIS IN A RESTAURANT. I RECIEVED WORRIED STARES FROM OTHER PATRONS AS I FEASTED UPON FUCKING CAT POOP. MY BABY SISTER REFUSED TO LET ME EAT THE TOOTSIE ROLLS BECAUSE SHE WAS ONE HUNDRED PERCENT CONVINCED IT WAS POOP, SHE RIPPED IT OUT OF MY HANDS AND THREW IT BACK IT THE PAN.
"SISSY!" SOMEONE WAS LOOKING ON HORRIFIED AS SHE GRABBED THE DISTURBING LOOKING CANDY OUT OF MY HAND. "DONT EAT POOP SISSY!"
a li tter box cae k„
congratulations on turning 91
look at this fucking cookie. look at it. i bought this fucking cookie at my school’s cafeteria. it is the size of my face. i bought it for 2 dollars. this cookie is supposed to inspire sharing among the students because its so fucking huge but clearly whoever thought of that little idea did not understand teenagers. this cookie is a challenge. nobody shares these cookies. they fucking eat the whole thing by themselves because its there. fucking gigantic cookies. fuck.
THE BEST COOKIE RECIPES :D